TAMMY DOYLE stood laughing and joking in her formal dress with a glass of wine in one hand.
She looked like any other woman at a formal dinner with her partner and his family, leaving her daughter with her mother.
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Tammy Doyle was in the grips of an alcohol addiction that saw her drink the equivalent of 100 glasses of wine a week Credit: David Cummings
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Tammy had a bottle of Lucozade full of vodka in her bag, plus a packet of mints to mask the smell of the drink on her breath.
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Tammy drank a few gins before dinner, and during the meal she went to the toilet for a sip of vodka
Like many of us, she spent the pre-Christmas festivities drinking – white wine with old friends, fizzy drinks with colleagues, large glasses of red wine tucked in front of the TV.
It’s the time of year when nobody bats an eye.
But with 60 percent of drinkers drinking during the season, that’s also the time when the secret problem of drinkers like Tammy can slip under the radar.
Because behind her glamorous and cheerful exterior was a sad reality.
She was in the grip of an alcohol addiction that caused her to drink the equivalent of 100 glasses of wine a week.
Tammy, 43, had a bottle of Lucozade full of vodka in her bag, plus a packet of mints to mask the smell of the drink on her breath.
She drank a few gins before dinner. And during the meal, she went to the toilet for a sip of vodka.
Tammy, who lives in east London with her daughter Caitlin, 20, and has now been sober for four years, said: “I’m relieved it’s Christmas. And everyone else was drunk. It was easier to hide the fact that I had been drinking all day.
“It’s horrible to admit that it was one of my favorite things about the holiday season. Since everyone else was having a cheeky glass of champagne for breakfast, I felt I fit right in.
“But my intake would triple at that time of year.
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“On two occasions, in 2017 and 2019, I ended up in the hospital shortly after, my body could not handle the amount of alcohol I drank — at least three bottles of wine and numerous glasses every day.
“That was equal to 100 glasses of wine a week.
“The mother found that I was unresponsive and called an ambulance.
“It’s extreme, but it didn’t start like that. It started with me drinking to gain confidence because I was shy.
“It escalated to remove the stresses of life. I had depression and anxiety, close family members died and relationships ended – things that happen to many women.
“That’s why I’m speaking to warn them, they could easily follow the same path as me.
‘Erase stress’
“Christmas in particular is a dangerous period. My drinking would escalate and I find it hard to get back to pre-holiday levels.”
Research by the charity Drinkaware shows that 57 per cent of adults will binge drink on Christmas Day and two-thirds will drink more than usual over the festive period.
Alcohol-related problems already account for 70 percent of emergency room admissions.
In 2022, more than 2,700 women died from alcohol-related liver disease, the highest number on record.
This marks an increase of 78 percent over the past 20 years, with a sharp increase of 31 percent as of 2019.
The age at which women are diagnosed is also getting younger, and more and more of them are in their forties.
Tammy’s liver is scarred and she is 20 percent more likely to develop liver cancer.
Her journey with alcohol was typical to begin with.
She got a job in administration after finishing school at the age of 16, and on Fridays after work she went out with colleagues.
She says: “I was shy and I was bullied at school, but when I had a drink I could talk to anyone.”
When Tammy got pregnant at 21, it was easy for her to stop drinking.
For the first four years of Catilino’s life, wine was just a weekend treat with friends.
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Tammy said: ‘We would go out with family and friends. They would never understand how drunk I was. I had techniques to hide it. Credit: Tammy Doyle
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When Tammy got pregnant at 21, it was easy for her to stop drinking Credit: Tammy Doyle
In 2008, the relationship with Caitlin’s dad broke up, and her drinking increased, but only on weekends when Caitlin would stay with her grandmother.
Tammy, who is studying to be a massage therapist, said: “I would gradually ask my mum to take her in for another day so I could continue the fun. Between 2010 and 2015 my binge drinking fluctuated.
“In 2012 I was diagnosed with depression and anxiety so I self-medicated. But for weeks I would barely drink and be able to hold down jobs, working in an admin role.
“Then it would escalate. You don’t suddenly start drinking in the morning, it’s gradual.
“I started earlier, then I didn’t have a day off. It was my crutch. My friends distanced themselves, and my mom was worried. But you’re deluding yourself that it’s normal and that everyone does it.”
By 2015, Tammy was struggling so much that she asked her mom to look after Caitlin.
She says: “I realized that I was sick and that I could not give her the stability she needed. I was in a toxic relationship and drank to escape reality. I felt so guilty about Caitlin that I would drink more to erase it.”
The relationship ended in 2016, and shortly after, Tammy got together with ex-partner Dave*.
“He knew I had problems, but he had no idea how bad they were.
“I brought mints and a bottle of perfume to mask the smell. I would hide the empty bottles in the outside bin.
“Until then, I was drinking all the time. I would even wake up at night with a pounding heart and drink a glass of wine to help me fall asleep.
We would go out with family and friends. They would never understand how drunk I was. I had techniques to hide it
Tammy Doyle
“We would go out with family and friends. They would never understand how drunk I was. I had techniques to hide it. I would drink in secret beforehand and I would always be the one pouring the drink so no one could tell how much I drank. It was exhausting trying to hide it, which is why I had Christmas when everyone would drink to the brim.
“I always wanted it to be magical for Caitlin, but I struggled.
“It’s hard to remember dates when your life is stained with alcohol. But one year I spent all my money on booze and had to buy presents in a charity shop.
“The second year, at my cousin’s house, I fell on her tree. And on another occasion I went Christmas shopping and was so drunk that I sat down only to fall into an alcoholic stupor and be woken up by someone asking if I was okay.
“I was so embarrassed, but so addicted that I would drink more to erase those feelings.
“I also felt tormented by guilt. In such a family moment, I knew I was failing as a mother.
“It’s so easy to overindulge at Christmas because everywhere you go someone offers you a drink, and alcohol is on special offer in supermarkets.”
New figures show that deaths directly attributable to alcohol have increased by 4.6 per cent between 2022 and 2023.
Ailsa Rutter, spokeswoman for NHS alcohol awareness charity Balance, said: “This is particularly important in the run-up to Christmas, when we see a glut of alcohol advertising, countless promotions in supermarkets and the inevitable pressure to drink.”
Last year, 8,274 people died in England from alcohol-specific causes, the majority from alcohol-related liver disease. That’s a 42 percent increase from 2019, before the pandemic.
Tammy could have easily been part of that statistic.
‘One more drink can kill’
In July 2020, she was admitted to the hospital, her stomach was so swollen that she looked pregnant, and her skin was yellow.
She needed a five-hour operation to stop bleeding in her liver and remained in the hospital for a month.
Doctors told her that one more drink could kill her. When she got home, she vowed to stay sober – and Caitlin came back to live with her.
But Tammy returned for five days in October and then in November, after her beloved grandmother died.
She says: “I told myself I could have a drink now and then.
“Not even my adoring daughter telling me she was going to go live with my mum again and knowing I could die couldn’t stop me.”
Tammy’s milestone came in December 2020.
She says: “I was at a Christmas party and I was supposed to be drinking water, but I had finished gin and tonics in my bag.
I was at a Christmas party and I was supposed to be drinking water, but I had finished gin and tonics in my bag
Tammy Doyle
“I sneaked to the bathroom and swallowed everything. Then I left, buying a bottle of prosecco on the way home. I planned to drink a lot.
“But I didn’t. I remember looking out the window and feeling a sense of peace come over me. I knew I was done.
“With the support of the charity Turning Point, I haven’t touched a drop since.
“My life cannot be different from the chaos before. I eat healthy, do yoga, go to the gym and meditate. My relationship with Caitlin is amazing.”
Tammy is so confident in her sobriety that she even works in a pub to finance her studies.
She says, “I see women there, outwardly confident and in control. But in some of them I recognize my former self. I try to talk to them and tell my story. I want them to know that you can change your life.”
Caitlin, who is studying to be a cosmetic therapist, says: “I don’t drink because I know very well what it can do to you. When I was about 11 years old, I became aware that my mom had a problem with alcohol. I felt angry and scared.
“I couldn’t understand why he couldn’t stop and was worried about embarrassing me.
“When I was 16, I was convinced that my mother would die in a year and I told myself that I had to get used to it.
“When she got sober, it took a year before I could believe she wasn’t coming back.
“But we slowly rebuilt our relationship and are now closer than ever.”
ARE YOU EXPOSED TO RISK?
Early signs of alcohol addiction include . .
- He drinks more than intended
- It’s hard for me to cut back
- Strong cravings
- Frequent thoughts about alcohol
- You have to drink more to get the same effect
- Withdrawal symptoms such as tremors, sweating, anxiety
- Drink is more important than duties,
- relationships or hobbies
Categories: Optical Illusion
Source: HIS Education