DEAR DEIDRE: As soon as we separated, I discovered that my wife was having sex with another man.
Now I found out he is married with kids and I think I should tell his wife he is sleeping with mine.
I am 42 years old, and my wife is 41 years old. We have been married for ten years and have a six-year-old son.
She ended our marriage after Christmas, saying she didn’t love me anymore.
I was deeply upset because I loved her and wanted my family to stay together.
Due to our financial situation, neither of us can afford to move out, so we still live together.
Get in touch with the Dear Deidre team
Every problem gets a personal answer from one of our trained advisors.
Fill out and submit our simple and confidential form and the Dear Deidre team will get back to you.
You can also send a private message on DearDeidreOfficial Facebook page or email us at:
Since we separated, my wife started going out all the time, expecting me to stay with our son. I assumed she was meeting a man.
In the end, she admitted it. She told me that her relationship started after we broke up, but I don’t believe her.
Curious, I pumped her friend for information. I found out that my wife’s lover is married and has small children.
I am furious with my wife for this. I’m also angry that this man — who I believe broke up my family — is getting away unscathed.
I think his wife should know what he’s really like so he can face the consequences.
It kills me to see my wife force herself to go out and have illicit sex.
She doesn’t see the problem because we are “separated”.
She doesn’t care about this man’s wife because he says he has no plans to leave her.
Should I call his wife and tell her the truth?
DEIDRE SAYS: You are obviously suffering a lot. Not only has your wife ended your marriage, she is now flaunting her new relationship in front of you.
But it won’t make you feel any better if you tell her lover’s wife that. All he’s going to do is hurt this woman.
From what you wrote, your main motivation is revenge, which is not a good reason.
Maybe she already knows what her husband is like.
You still live with your wife, which is not easy.
If you blow her affair, it can make life together unbearable and unsustainable.
You have to think of your son, who is already dealing with your breakup.
See my support package, When Parents Fall Out, for more on how parental discord affects children.
Take out your anger in another way. Talk to a friend, write down your feelings, spend some energy in the gym.
Counseling may also help. See my support package on this.
Categories: Optical Illusion
Source: HIS Education