In the first episode of his podcast, ‘Everybody Loves Tom’, the ‘Vanderpump Rules’ star admitted that the revelation of his affair with Leviss pushed him over the edge
Tom Sandoval revealed that he contemplated suicide after his affair with co-star Raquel Leviss ended.
In the first episode of his podcast Everyone loves Tomthe Vanderpump Rules star admitted that the discovery of his affair with Leviss pushed him to the brink of suicide.
The Bravo star described how he felt overwhelmed, unable to see beyond his emotions. Sandoval said the intensity of those feelings culminated one day after returning to the home he once shared with his ex, Ariana Madix.
Sandoval recalled running into the late Linkin Park singer Chester Bennington days before he died by suicide in July 2017, and Sandoval said he never understood how Bennington could be in such a state of mind until he was in the middle of a complete same thoughts.
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“I’ll never forget this. Like I went to the Grove and I was a big Linkin Park fan, and I saw Chester at The Grove coming out of the garage,” Sandoval told his friend, celebrity jewelry designer Kyle Chan.
“He seemed happy or, I don’t know, he was just alive, energetic on the phone. I saw him. I said, ‘Oh my God, it’s Chester.’ Literally, a few days later, he died. You know, he killed himself. And I couldn’t, I could never understand why, but once you get into that headspace, it’s like a domino effect. Your world starts to collapse in on itself and you can’t see beyond your feelings. Your peripheral is leaving. Your feeling like, thinking about the future, like your ability to snap out of it is disappearing. And there were moments where, you know, I felt very, very close.”
The TOMTOM bar owner hit the headlines in March when news broke that he had been cheating on Madix with Leviss. Sources told PEOPLE it lasted six months, leaving Madix both “blindsided” and “devastated.”
Sandoval has to his credit a handful of staunch friends, incl Vanderpump Rules co-star Billie Lee, for standing by him in the midst of the turmoil, acknowledging that their unwavering support essentially saved his life. The reality TV star also delved into his dynamic with Leviss, 28, highlighting the challenges of loneliness he faced while she was being treated at a mental health facility.
“I was kind of at her beck and call in a sense because you couldn’t have your phone in there. No access to anything. And so I had to wait for her call, which can only happen twice, once a day,” Sandoval said. “And so, when I would get that call from her, it would be like, ‘Oh, my God,’ but I kept waiting there. And then, you know, some days, I wouldn’t get that call and it would, you know, really affect my mood.”
Following the revelation of Sandoval’s prolonged affair with Leviss, her rep confirmed that she had sought mental health treatment at a program in Arizona. Her representative confirmed that she was not there for “rehabilitation,” but a program focused on “mental health and trauma therapy.”
After the controversy, Sandoval and Leviss parted ways. While Leviss gave up VPR, Sandoval chose to return for the final season. In the podcast, Sandoval said he hadn’t spoken to Leviss since late June.
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Amidst the turmoil, Sandoval reflects that his infidelity to Madix taught him valuable lessons and strives to improve.
“It was such a learning experience, you know, going through everything and what I was doing and taking the time to actually see the consequences of my actions,” the Bravo star said. “And, you know, when you’re in a scenario like that and you’re so emotionally wrapped up in your feelings, you don’t think logically and you’re just fucking selfish.”
If you or someone you know is struggling or in crisis, help is available. Call or text 988 or chat 988lifeline.org.
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Source: HIS Education