Who Is Kal Penn’s Fiancé Josh? All About His Longtime Partner

Kal Penn gave fans a big surprise when he revealed that not only has he been in a relationship for 11 years, but he is also engaged. While promoting his 2021 memoir. You can’t be seriousPenn opened up to PEOPLE about her fiancé Josh.

Penn is an actor known for his roles in films including Harold and Kumar go to the White Castle and Namesake and in TV shows such as House and Designated as a survivor. Although he has spent a lot of time in the spotlight, his fiancee is very reserved.

The actor told PEOPLE that his and Josh’s relationship was always open to the people they met in public and within their circle of friends and family. However, Penn didn’t want to share their relationship with the world until his book was published to protect Josh’s privacy.

“I’ve always been very public with anyone I’ve interacted with in person. Whether it’s someone I met at a bar, if Josh and I are out or talking to friends,” Penn told PEOPLE in October 2021.

He continued, “I’m really excited to share our relationship with readers. But Josh, my parents and my brother — the four people I’m closest to in the family — are pretty quiet. They don’t like attention and are shy of the spotlight.”

That being the case, not much is known about Josh beyond what Penn has shared about him in interviews and in his book. So who is Kal Penn’s fiance Josh? Here’s everything you need to know about him and his relationship with the actor.

Penn first talked about Josh in his memoir

Kal Penn with his memoirs.

Kal Penn on Instagram

Penn revealed his relationship with Josh in his 2021 memoir. You can’t be serious. He shared with PEOPLE that he had to balance keeping the privacy of his loved ones and being open about his own story.

“Unraveling the narrative [in the book], about respecting who they really are, with telling my story — that includes: my work life, both in Hollywood and in DC, it includes my love life with Josh and how we met, it includes my parents, to an extent to whom I am willing to share stories about growing up,” he said. “That was the most important thing for me. I wanted my story to be authentic from my perspective and told in a way that made you feel like you really got to know me.”

Penn said the same thing in the 2021 interview The New York Times about memoirs, “I was sure that I wanted to share two stories: one about my parents and their upbringing; and the story of how Josh and I met.”

Penn’s first impression of Josh didn’t give him any hope for a relationship

Kal Penn and guest at the New York Knicks vs. Detroit Pistons game at Madison Square Garden on March 31, 2018.

James Devaney/Getty

Penn and Josh met while the actor was living in Washington, DC while working in the Office of Public Engagement during the Obama administration.

Penn described their first date in his book – and his first impression of Josh was not promising. Josh showed up at Penn’s apartment with an 18-pack of Coors Light and put NASCAR on the TV.

“I thought, ‘This is obviously not going to work,'” Penn told PEOPLE. “I have a day off at the White House, and this guy is unironically watching cars go around and turn left? Next thing you know, it’s been a few months and we’re watching NASCAR every Sunday. I’m like, ‘What’s going on?’ ”

Penn said The New York Times that at that moment he thought, “This guy is leaving here in 40 minutes with 16 beers.” He added: “So the fact that we’re together 11 years later is funny because so many people have dating stories that went wrong but now they’re married with kids.”

They were seen together on rare occasions

Kal Penn, Chasten Buttigieg, Pete Buttigieg and friends in New York

Kal Penn on Instagram

Josh is private to the point where he hasn’t been photographed in public with Penn often, but they have been seen together at several basketball games.

In 2018, they were photographed at a game between the New York Knicks and Detroit Pistons at Madison Square Garden in New York, and the following year they were seen at another Knicks game where the team played against the Los Angeles Clippers.

Josh also doesn’t appear on Penn’s social media, but a photo from June 2021 appears to show the couple with politician Pete Buttigieg and his husband Chasten Buttigieg.

Penn’s family supports their relationship

Kal Penn attends BuzzFeed’s “AM to DM” on March 11, 2020 in New York City.

Dimitrios Kambouris/Getty

Penn told PEOPLE that his family is supportive of his relationship with Josh and his coming out as gay. (Prior to revealing her relationship with Josh, Penn was not a public figure.)

“I shared things with my parents and close friends first,” he said Smile star told PEOPLE. “I know this sounds corny, but it’s true: Once you’ve told your Indian parents and the South Asian community that you intend to make a living as an actor, every conversation that comes after that is really easy.

He continued, “They’re just like, ‘Yeah, okay.’ I felt a lot of support from everyone. It’s a wonderful thing. I know everyone has different experiences with it, so I definitely feel very lucky.”

Penn also spoke about his personal journey. “I discovered my own sexuality relatively late in life compared to many other people,” he explained. “There’s no timeline on these things. People figure out their s— at different times in their lives, so I’m glad I did when I did.”

They disagree about what kind of wedding they want

Penn also opened up to PEOPLE about planning a 2021 wedding. He said at the time that he and Josh weren’t on the same page when it came to what size wedding they wanted.

“Due to the pandemic, many wedding talks have stopped,” he explained. “We’re both very understated about all the pomp and circumstance. Now there is a big disagreement whether it is a big or a small wedding.”

Penn continued: “I want a big Indian wedding. Josh hates attention and [has said], ‘Or we could just do a quick 20-minute thing with our families and that’s it.’ So we have to meet halfway in the middle.”

The actor said they would probably be on the same page when it comes to one aspect: keeping guests brief. Even if I win and get our giant Indian wedding, I guarantee you we’ll still be dolls that are like [to our invited guests], ‘Hey, we’re getting married in two weeks. Will you come?’ ” He said.

Maybe they have a famous wedding officiant

Kal Penn; Cardi B.

Gregg DeGuire/FilmMagic; Dimitrios Kambouris/Getty

Penn has been tight-lipped about his and Josh’s wedding over the past few years, but fans know they could have a famous officiant when they tie the knot.

In November 2021, Penn posted on X (formerly Twitter) that he had a dream about Cardi B performing his and Josh’s wedding ceremony.

“Cardi B was on my flight to LA,” he wrote. “I fell asleep and dreamed that she officiated our wedding on the plane and the three of us walked out of LAX holding hands.”

Cardi then responded, “First off, why didn’t you say hi! Second, I have permission to do sooo……..let me know.” The “Bongos” rapper recently hosted a wedding as part of her Facebook Watch series Cardi is trying.

Penn shot back, “You’re the best. I wanted to say hi, but I didn’t want to be disrespectful (your do not disturb light was on). But for God’s sake— let’s do it! We lose if down!”

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Source: HIS Education