Allison Holker Says She Talked to Stephen ‘tWitch’ Boss ‘Almost Every Single Night’ After His Death: ‘I Forgave Him’

Allison Holker Boss reflects on her grief and finding forgiveness following the death of her husband, Stephen “tWitch” Boss.

In the latest episode Viall files podcast, the So you think you can dance alum, 35, revealed she was still on the phone with Stephen after he committed suicide at the age of 40 on December 13, 2022.

“I talked to him really actively,” she said. “I talked to him almost every night, for a very long time. It would be about anything and everything. Could it be how was today? …Or sometimes I would get really upset and yell at him.”

Allison Holker at the Los Angeles premiere of Sony Pictures’ “The Book Of Clarence” at the Academy Museum of Motion Pictures on January 5, 2024.

Monica Schipper/WireImage

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New So you think you can dance The judge added that their conversations ranged widely, saying: “Sometimes I just screamed and there were times when I said, ‘Okay, I’m choosing a school for the kids.’ What do you think of this school?’ And then just wait for the answer. Yeah. You know, and we’d talk about all kinds of things like that.”

The professional dancer also recalled the “greatest conversation” she had with him, which was “the most healing”.

“I was outside and I was looking at the stars and I said — whether it was necessary or not, I don’t know whether it was necessary or necessary — but I forgave him,” she said. “And I said, ‘I hope you find that peace.’ I sincerely hope he found the peace he needed and felt like he needed. You know? And that’s really hard to do.”

Allison Holker and Stephen ‘tWitch’ Boss on “Pop of the Morning” on February 18, 2020.

Monica Schipper/E! Entertainment/NBCU stock photos via Getty

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“But I just have so much that I want, I had to allow myself to almost let go of it for him,” she continued. “And so we just had this long dialogue and I did. I said: ‘I forgive you and I hope you have that peace. And I have him and I have children, we have each other. We’ll be fine.’”

Elsewhere in the conversation, Keep Dancing Through: A Boss Family Groove the author told host Nick Viall that she still feels Stephen’s “presence.”

“He still protects me. I can still feel it. My children also talk about it,” she said. “And his love that was so great for us is still with us. You know? And so as far as I’m concerned, I’m just trying to stick with it and remember that I’m still going to have rainy days. I will still have a lot of crashes. There is so much more to this journey that I have yet to experience, but it all depends on how you choose to navigate it.”

She continued: “It would be very easy for me and I’ve had a lot of people say to me, ‘Why don’t you just go crazy? Or why don’t you just, you know, cry in the corner for a bit?’ Honestly, a lot of people would like to see me cry in the corner, which I did. A lot of people would like to see me there again.”

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Ellen DeGeneres and Stephen “tWitch” Boss.

Mike Rozman/NBCU Photo Bank/NBCUniversal via Getty

Allison also revealed how Ellen DeGeneres has supported her in the past year following her husband’s death. (Stephen and Ellen have shared a close friendship since he joined The Ellen DeGeneres Show as a guest DJ in 2014. He eventually became a series regular and was elevated to co-executive producer status in 2020 before it ended in May 2022.)

“I have so many amazing people around me,” she said. “Ellen was a huge support and still is, you know, she always had such wise words for me. And I would really say that, apart from me and some of our dearest friends, she knew him better than anyone.”

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“I don’t shy away from the opinion that some people know someone more than others,” she added. “It’s not a competition. Like her, she knew him, you know? That. She spent a lot of time with him. So we had really nice conversations about it and him, and we shared laughs and sorrows.”

She concluded: “But she would always give some really solid, sensible advice for me and my future and getting through everything and supporting my kids.”

If you or someone you know is thinking about suicide, contact the 988 Suicide and Crisis Line by dialing 988, texting “STRENGTH” to the Crisis Line at 741741 or going to 988lifeline.org.

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Source: HIS Education