DEAR DEIDRE: MY husband had sex with a friend’s daughter – someone I watched grow up and even looked after.
She is now 28 years old, a beautiful young woman, and he is acting like a cat that has been creamed. I’m devastated.
I am 49 years old, and my husband is 52 years old. We have been together for 25 years, but I always had a hard time trusting him and often caught him in a lie.
Last year he lost interest in me, he didn’t want to touch me at all and I knew something was wrong.
Even though I tried to talk to him, he just wasn’t interested.
At the same time, my colleague started chasing me.
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I kept rejecting him until one night we got closer and ended up having sex.
I had never strayed before and I knew it was wrong, but it felt so good to have someone take an interest in me.
However, I couldn’t live with what I had done, so I confessed to my husband the next day.
Dear Deidre, you understand why your man stopped having sex
Instead of throwing a tantrum, he confessed to his affair.
He calmly suggested that we draw a line under both of our infidelities—simply saying that we were even and we both misbehaved.
We had a big fight. He seems to think I’ll just get over it, but I can’t get over the fact that I had revenge sex, knowing deep down that he’s been cheating on me for years.
I want a divorce, but he won’t even talk about it. I have nowhere to go back, I know I don’t love him anymore.
DEIDRE SAYS: Cheating for revenge doesn’t take away the pain or make things better. It may be tempting to take revenge, but in reality there is little satisfaction.
Betrayal can destroy trust in a relationship, and it can take a long time to restore it.
Be honest with your husband and explain to him how you feel. Tell him how much his affair hurt you.
You’ve spent years feeling vulnerable and unable to trust, so it’s no surprise that you may be considering divorce as your preferred path forward.
And unless your husband goes out of his way to convince you, this route might be your best option.
But please consider that parting ways doesn’t have to be your only choice.
If you decide you want to try, it’s possible for it to go through an affair.
My Support Package Cheating – Can You Get Over It? explains more.
Categories: Optical Illusion
Source: HIS Education