Jelly Roll Reveals How He Found ‘Peace’ After Reconsidering His Relationship with Alcohol and Cocaine (Exclusive)

When Jelly Roll answers the phone, he’s in the middle of a police escort en route to the Genesee County Jail in Flint, Michigan, where he plans to play some music for the inmates.

The “Save Me” soul singer, 39, has had countless run-ins with the law of his own throughout his life — he’s been in jail about 40 times on various drug charges. When he was first arrested, he was only 14 years old.

Fast forward more than 20 years later, Jelly — born Jason DeFord — is enjoying the great success this year has brought him: three No. 1 hits. 1 in the country, released a big album Whitsitt Chapel (his seventh studio record, but first official foray into country) and won New Artist of the Year at the CMA Awards.

And now Jelly has even received two Grammy nominations, including one for Best New Artist.

Jelly Roll at his CMA Awards in Nashville on November 8, 2023.

Scott Kirkland/Disney via Getty

However, the reformed family man was not always on the straight and narrow path. Before he could go on and build on country music fame, Jelly had to come clean, and that meant re-examining his relationship with some challenging vices.

“I had to learn that you can drink alcohol without cocaine. It took me a long time to learn that,” he tells PEOPLE. “I never said that, but it’s true. For a long time I just assumed, when people told me they were drinking without cocaine, I thought we were only drinking to consume cocaine.”

Although Jelly has never attended drug rehab, he spends a lot of time visiting various centers around the country where he will bring hot meals, play some songs and “do some encouragement.” The same works in juvenile centers.

“I’ve always said that if I’m ever in this situation, I’ll do whatever I can to fight back,” he says. “The fact that just showing up in places can make people happy is such a gift, and I feel like I should show up, if God gave me that gift.”

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However, before he could begin appearing for others, Jelly first had to appear for himself.

His relationship with alcohol remained complicated as he navigated life beyond drug addiction: “I thought [drinking] was to make us not feel like drug addicts. Nobody wants to snort cocaine sober, then you’re a junkie. But I had to reevaluate my relationship with alcohol in that way,” he says.

Jelly Roll performs in Washington, DC on December 11, 2023.

Theo Wargo/Getty

“I’ve never had a problem with alcohol, so I’ll still have a cocktail, but very, especially this year, very rarely,” he adds. “Like, a special night kind of thing, like CMA night, of course we had fun. But I’m just trying to stay away from drugs.”

These days, Jelly’s vices remain alcohol and marijuana, but he indulges cautiously, he says, and is aware of his behavior.

“I’ve never talked about it in interviews, but since I drink and smoke weed, I’ll occasionally come to meetings. If I’m really struggling to think about my behavior pattern, I’ll go to a meeting,” he shares. “It’s just that, out of great respect for people who have really gotten completely free from drugs, alcohol, and weed, I don’t necessarily claim to be part of the program, because I respect their work and I would never want to diminish that by some of my actions, but AA has done a lot for me.”

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Jelly also credits his family for helping him turn his life around: he is father to daughter Bailee, 15, and son Noah, 7, from two previous relationships, and he is the parent of children with his wife of seven years, a podcaster Bunnie Xo, 43.

Jelly Roll, Bailee and Bunnie Xo on Easter 2022.

Jelly Roll/Instagram

“I’m very close to my family,” says Jelly, who adds that he comes from “big white trash” in Nashville. “Being a father is so important to me. The most impressive event in my entire life was having a daughter. It changed everything.”

Bailee was born while Jelly was behind bars on crack cocaine charges at just 23 years old. He says he sees his daughter’s birth as a “Christian text about when Saul turned into Paul on the Damascus road. It was a moment for me.”

Today, Jelly admits that his life is not a life without a daily struggle. His latest addiction is to “the pantry,” he says, but he can only deal with quitting “one addiction at a time.”

“I’m a man who gets it,” he says. “A man who comes from a place where no one understood.”

“I have come to terms with my past a lot. I mean, it still haunts me like the ghosts I know, but I’ll tell you what, today I’m not thinking about not doing drugs,” adds Jelly. “As for today, I don’t know about tomorrow, but I can tell you, today, right now, I’m happy,” he says.

For more Jelly Roll, pick up the latest issue of PEOPLE, on newsstands everywhere Friday.

Categories: Trends
Source: HIS Education