A confused man wonders if he is invading his girlfriend’s privacy.
A man, 30, took to the popular Reddit forum “Am I A——” to ask if he should ask his girlfriend, 28, for permission every time someone comes “for a second” to the house they recently bought together.
“The problem that keeps coming up is that my girlfriend keeps saying that I’m letting others invade her privacy by bringing guests like family members, friends, etc. who stop by my house for a while even though I told her this in advance,” the man explained. “They’re usually just there to pick up a tool I’ve borrowed, give me an item real quick, that kind of thing.”
A couple is arguing (photo).
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He continued, “Sometimes a friend will call me and say ‘Hey, I’m in your area, do you mind if I pick up my bike that I left at your place?’ to which I will say: ‘Yes, no problem’. Then I’ll let my girlfriend know.”
He shared that his girlfriend “will get mad because I don’t ask her if it’s okay before I agree.”
“I understand planning an event, hosting guests for a long time, getting together, but someone coming just for a moment?” he asked, noting that he didn’t think he should ask for “permission” as long as he made it clear who was coming and when they were coming.
The man also admitted he would feel “weird” telling potential guests he had to “check with his girlfriend” before even the briefest of visits, adding that “no one I know” does the same.
“Am I——?” he asked fellow Redditors.
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The couple disagrees (photo).
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One commenter needed more information before forming an opinion, asking: “Do these people come to hang out? Or is it literally stopping by to grab something and go? Is she expected to interact?”
The original poster replied: “They’ll hang out for a minute because they’re already there, but half the time they don’t even go inside. We’ll just chat in the yard or at the front door. If they need to go to the bathroom or something, I’ll let them in, but I just feel like my girlfriend hates visitors whether I ask her about it or not.”
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Another person stated that the boy “didn’t…—–.”
“I would see a difference between people coming in and stopping for a significant amount of time, but just to pick something up? It seems like she makes a mountain out of a molehill — unless there’s a special reason, like people coming when she’s already ready to sleep, or she’s sick, or something like that. In that case, I’d say you better read the room,” the commenter wrote before offering a potential solution.
“But on the other hand, to keep the peace, I’d tell her ‘Hey, is it okay for X to stop by in a few minutes’ instead of texting X first and letting her know,” they added. which was voted for by 70 people.
Another commenter said they were referring to the man’s girlfriend in this scenario and also argued for a compromise.
“As someone who really doesn’t like anyone barging in unannounced, I understand where your girlfriend is coming from, but living together means you both have to compromise on things like this,” they wrote. “That is, you should allow a drop-in to happen, but you have to make sure it’s a drop-in, not a walk-in. Have a quick chat at the door, then send them on their way – without coming for a coffee or a beer.”
Categories: Trends
Source: HIS Education