Melissa Etheridge Reveals How She Forgave Sister She Accused of Abuse: 'It Just Eats at You' (Exclusive)

Melissa Etheridge believes forgiveness is the key to healing.

The Grammy-winning singer-songwriter, 63, opens up in this week’s issue of PEOPLE magazine about her decision to let go of the sexual abuse she said her older sister Jenny inflicted on her during their childhood.

“If you don’t forgive, it just eats you up and you harm yourself. My favorite quote is ‘Resentment is like drinking poison and hoping someone else dies,’ she says. “You have to say, ‘Okay, this happened, and man, did I learn.’ If you can give it respect and gratitude and just go the other way, I don’t mind.”

Etheridge first disclosed the sexual abuse in her 2001 memoir It’s true…my life is in love and music. In his memoirs from 2023 Talking to My Angels, expanded on her allegations, writing that her sister began abusing her when she was 6 or 7 years old. Jennifer has not publicly commented on the allegations.

The “Come to My Window” singer wrote that when they were alone, her sister would “touch me sexually and demand that I touch her… Like many victims of abuse, I felt somehow responsible and ashamed about it.”

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Melissa Etheridge performs in May 2023.

Erika Goldring/Getty Images

Etheridge tells PEOPLE that now her sister is “not on my mind — ever.”

“She finally came to my exhibition last year. I hadn’t seen her in 17 years and I said, ‘Well, hello. Look at yourself,’ she recalls. “It’s not important. If I stuck to it [resentment]I’m just sick.”

Etheridge has moved on from her past and is now the proud wife of TV producer Linda Wallem and the proud mom of daughter Bailey (27) with ex-partner Julie Cypher and twins Johnnie and Miller (17) with ex-wife Tammy Lynn Michaels. (Her beloved son Beckett died of an opioid overdose in 2020 at the age of 21).

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The star is also helping others come to terms with their own pasts in a new two-part documentary series titled Melissa Etheridge: I’m not broken (out July 9 on Paramount+), in which she performs an all-female rock show at the Topeka Correctional Facility, a prison near her hometown of Leavenworth, Kansas.

“It was such a great experience and I learned so much,” she says of making the documentaries. “I can’t wait for the world to see it”

For more on Melissa Etheridge, pick up the latest issue of PEOPLE, on newsstands everywhere Friday.

If you or someone you know has been a victim of sexual abuse, text “STRENGTH” to the crisis line at 741-741 to be connected to a certified crisis counselor.

Categories: Trends
Source: HIS Education