DEAR DEIDRE: FRIENDS and family said I was a fool to marry an older man – now it seems they were right.
I’m 18 years younger than him and our relationship was exciting, but now he’s having affairs with women even younger than me.
I had no reason to doubt his intentions, but when I saw him looking at and entertaining younger women, I reconsidered everything.
He is 60 and I am 42. We have been married for 14 years and have two children.
When we first met, I was 28 and he was 46, divorced with three children.
Our love quickly blossomed and it wasn’t long before we started planning our future together.
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My family and friends questioned our relationship and made it clear that they did not approve of our age difference.
I naively interpreted it as judgmental, but as we grew up, I began to understand their concerns.
At first our relationship was amazing, but over the last few years I noticed he was staring longingly at other women.
If they are younger and slimmer than me, he loses control and openly flirts in front of me.
Every time I told him how it made me feel, he shrugged and told me I was delusional.
To make matters worse, he has recently become secretive with his phone. He exchanged explicit messages with women in their 30s and I’m sure he met some of them.
He texts non-stop and barely finds a moment to take his head off the phone.
My confidence has hit rock bottom and I worry that I will never be enough for him.
DEIDRE SAYS: It’s clear that your husband is fully aware of how upsetting this is for you, but he does it anyway.
While it’s normal to still find other people attractive, acting that way, especially in front of you, is disrespectful.
Find a moment when you are both calm and let him know how you feel.
Explain to him that even though he behaves like this, it doesn’t matter to you, and by firing you in this way, he is insulting you.
Say that he’s putting your relationship in jeopardy and he can’t expect you to ignore it anymore.
If he won’t make any effort to change, seek support to explore your next move, staying in a relationship like this brings misery.
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Categories: Optical Illusion
Source: HIS Education