Michael Oher Still Believes in Adoption ‘Despite’ What Happened to Him, and Other Revelations from New Memoir

Michael Oher’s shocking allegation that he was never legally adopted — which would mean a central component of award-winning film The Blind Side was misrepresented — came one week after the former NFL star opened up about his inspiring life in a new memoir.Oher, 37, released When Your Back’s Against the Wall: Fame, Football, and Lessons Learned through a Lifetime of Adversity earlier this month, just days before making a bombshell legal filing on Monday in which he asked a judge to release him from a conservatorship and alleged the family that claimed to have adopted him lied about the story, and made millions.

Once struggling with homelessness as a teenager, Oher was taken in by Sean and Leigh Anne Tuohy when he was 18 years old and finishing out high school. As depicted in multiple books and later the 2009 Oscar-nominated film The Blind Side, the Tuohys called Oher part of their family and indicated he was adopted under their care.

Oher went on to earn a college football scholarship at Ole Miss, was drafted in the first round by the Baltimore Ravens and went on to win a Super Bowl, all the while the narrative behind The Blind Side shadowed his career. 

“The movie turned me into something so rare it almost doesn’t exist — a famous offensive lineman,” the now-retired NFL player writes near the beginning of his new book.

Penguin Random House

However, according to his filing on Monday, Oher was crushed to discover a core piece of that narrative was a lie back in February when his attorney learned the Tuohys never officially adopted him, but rather had him sign paperwork entering into a conservatorship.

Sean Tuohy, the father, told The Daily Memphian on Monday that Oher’s allegations “are insulting” and claimed the family’s only option was conservatorship because Oher was 18 years old at the time. The Tuohys’ son, Sean Jr., has also disputed Oher’s claim that his family made “millions.”

Oher’s attorney alleges in Monday’s filing that the former football player was tricked into signing the agreement.

“Where other parents of Michael’s classmates saw Michael simply as a nice kid in need, Conservators Sean Tuohy and Leigh Anne Tuohy saw something else: a gullible young man whose athletic talent could be exploited for their own benefit,” Oher’s attorney J. Gerard Stranch IV wrote in the filing. 

As the dispute plays out in public and in court, Oher’s new book sheds more light on how he feels about his childhood, how The Blind Side misrepresented his upbringing and how “despite” all that, he still believes in adoption and the movie’s central message.

Michael Oher, Who Inspired ‘The Blind Side,’ Alleges Family Made Millions While Lying About Adopting Him

Michael Oher.
Scott Cunningham/Getty

Oher Felt Like He “Lost Control” of His Own Narrative

Oher writes that soon after author Michael Lewis’ 2006 book The Blind Side came out, he began to notice fame impacting how he was perceived. Meanwhile, “I decided to keep my head down” and focus on football and his classes at Ole Miss. “As I would learn later, when you’re silent like that, a lot of times you give people license to say whatever they want about you,” he writes. “Things that are not true.”

The Super Bowl champion writes that despite his best efforts, the narrative surrounding him completely changed after the film adaptation of Lewis’ book hit the silver screen in 2009, just after he was drafted into the NFL. “The way most of the world knows me is from a movie. A character that came from somebody else’s imagination,” Oher writes.“While the movie did a great job of raising awareness about teens in foster care who might succeed if given a loving family and a chance, it did not do a good job of accurately painting my life,” he adds.

Never miss a story — sign up for PEOPLE’s free daily newsletter to stay up-to-date on the best of what PEOPLE has to offer, from celebrity news to compelling human interest stories.“But it’s a strange process to live through: to suddenly lose control of your own story and to have your story written and nearly completed before you were approached for an interview,” he writes.

He adds that his childhood struggles were largely a “solo journey,” despite occasional help from others. Oher writes, “I survived the hands dealt to me from the ages of three to eighteen, before the Tuohys ever entered the scene like you saw on the big screen.”

Michael Oher at the 2009 NFL Draft.

Jeff Zelevansky/Getty

Afterwards, Oher ‘Just Went Along with the Movie Narrative’ 

Oher says he and others depicted in The Blind Side “just went along with the movie narrative” despite misleading portrayals.

In one chapter of his new book, Oher recalls the moment his previous guardian “Big Tony” Henderson brought him to Briarcrest High School in Eads, Tenn. to talk with John Harrington, the school’s basketball coach and old friend of his. It’s a moment overdramatically portrayed in the film, according to Oher, who recalls the conversation between the two being rather routine and straightforward — and not happening while Oher is dominating on a basketball court just outside the window to Harrington’s office.

“Despite how the story might have been told in the past, there was one person who was a big part of getting me in the door of Briarcrest: John Harrington, the basketball coach,” Oher writes. “He, like me, just went along with the movie narrative.”

Sean Tuohy Speaks Out About ‘Blind Side’ Subject Michael Oher’s Legal Claims: ‘The Allegations Are Insulting’

Michael Oher.
George Gojkovich/Getty Images

Son in ‘Blind Side’ Family Says He Gets Why Michael Oher ‘Is Mad’ but Denies He Has ‘Millions’

He Still Believes In Adoption ‘Despite’ His Dispute With the Tuohys

While Oher says the pressure of The Blind Side and the skewed perception it created about his life troubled him for years, he writes in his new book that there’s many things he wouldn’t change — including his belief in adoption.

“You might think that is crazy, considering some of the grievances I’ve aired, but despite any complexities that have come from my own personal story, I wholeheartedly believe in adoption,” Oher writes. “Adoption is a good thing. It’s part of what I hope to dedicate the rest of my life to.”

Since retiring from the NFL in 2017, Oher has dedicated much of his time to volunteering at foster care organizations, as well as creating his own foundation, Beat the Odds, Inc., which is dedicated to “helping kids from hard places achieve their dreams.”

Michael Oher.
George Gojkovich/Getty

Oher Still Believes In the Positive Message Behind The Blind Side

Despite everything, Oher writes that “there were so many good things that came out of The Blind Side.”“There has been so much created from The Blind Side that I am grateful for, which is why you might find it as a shock that the experience surrounding the story has also been a large source of some of my deepest hurt and pain over the past fourteen years.”

From When Your Back’s Against the Wall: Fame, Football, and Lessons Learned through a Lifetime of Adversity by Michael Oher published by Avery, an imprint of Penguin Publishing Group, a division of Penguin Random House LLC Copyright © 2023 by Michael Oher and Don Yaeger

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Source: HIS Education