Valerie Bertinelli pays tribute to her late father as she reflects on her relationship with “complicated men”.
On Saturday, December 7, Bertinelli, 64, shared an Instagram featuring a series of photos of herself with her father, Andrew Bertinelli, who died in 2016 at the age of 82.
“It’s been eight years since my father passed away,” the former Food Network star shared in the caption of her post. She then went on to reflect on how her perception of her father changed when she began to put him in the context of his parents and childhood, noting that he “never had a role model of what a father could or should be.
“His father, Nazzareno Bertinelli, left his wife and son in Italy, moved to America, worked in the coal mines and married my grandmother Angelina,” she said. “I still don’t know if Nonnie knew or not. I know my father eventually knew because we found several letters from his half-brother after my father’s death. He never told us about it.”
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She recalled that her grandfather used to “frighten me” while at other times he also showed kindness.
Valerie Bertinelli and her father Andrew Bertinelli.
Valerie Bertinelli/Instagram
“Men have confused me ever since,” she admitted. “I’ve witnessed that they can be kind and yet terrible, never knowing what I’m going to get.”
The Hot in Cleveland the actress shared at the time that her relationship with her father wasn’t easy — and that it had a lifelong impact on her romantic relationships.
“My father had crazy high expectations. He was a strict and aggressive father to his sons, and a loving but judgmental father to me… I don’t even know how to explain how he treated my mother. I’m still trying to unravel the tangled thread of being modeled on what love is between two people.”
“I loved my father,” she wrote. “I still want to. Only now I see him with clearer eyes. And not without feeling guilty for condemning him and his behavior. I have sympathy for him. He could only work with the knowledge and experience he had. He was a complicated man.”
“I still fall for complicated men,” she concluded.
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Valerie Bertinelli and her father Andrew Bertinelli.
Valerie Bertinelli/Instagram
Bertinelli finalized her divorce from ex-husband Tom Vitale on November 22, 2022. She announced the divorce on social media in November 2024, celebrating what she called “two years of freedom”.
“Two years of walking through self-doubt and doing my best to come out the other side,” she continued. “Two years of realizing that I don’t deserve to tolerate the unbearable. Two years of working through shame and self-loathing. (I’m still working on that part🥴long tail that😅) Two years of work on finding the real me.”
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Bertinelli dated writer Mike Goodnough from March until they broke up in November, according to a source. She has since shared several vulnerable messages with fans about her journey with mental health.
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“So I don’t know if you can tell from this video (and my heart is still beating a little fast as I write this) that I had a really bad anxiety attack today,” she wrote in a Nov. 17 Instagram caption. video, which showed the handshake. “I haven’t felt like this for a very, very long time. A few hours ago I was crying uncontrollably, and my heart felt like it was pounding out of my chest. I couldn’t stop shaking.”
“Has anyone else had an extreme anxiety attack and then it takes a while for the after effects to subside?” she asked fans in the post.
“Anyway…” she added, “This bit of vulnerability is brought to you by someone who wants you to know you’re not alone. I love you 🤍.”
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Source: HIS Education