Ryan Reynolds Says Parents Today Are ‘So Soft’ Compared to His Childhood: ‘It Was an Improvised Militia’

Ryan Reynolds is open about his and wife Blake Lively’s parenting style and how the way he processes his emotions has evolved over time.

The Deadpool & Wolverine star, 47, spoke at HubSpot’s INBOUND tech conference in Boston on Friday, Sept. 20, where PEOPLE heard him reveal an influential moment that helped him better understand his emotions.

“I did a conflict resolution workshop and it changed my whole life,” the Wrexham co-owner told author and moderator Marcus Collins on stage. “I just didn’t know how to process the things I was feeling. because I [had a] thinking about scarcity when I was younger. I didn’t know how to expose that thing in your brain that conditions you to always win or be right.”

Ryan Reynolds speaks at HubSpot’s INBOUND conference in Boston on September 20, 2024.

Benjamin Esakof/Halo Creative/HubSpot

Ryan Reynolds shares ‘really important’ parenting advice that affects what his four kids say (Exclusive)

“Something I love [conflict resolution]and I know this isn’t very fancy, but what I love about it is that you can meet someone where they are, and you don’t have to be right or wrong,” Reynolds added. “You can disagree and still connect. ”

While Reynolds said dealing with his feelings is something he’s learned to do as an adult, the same isn’t true for his children: “I have 4 kids and so far none of them seem to have it [scarcity mindset]partly because they were born on ‘Easy Street,'” he said with a laugh.

The four children of Blake Lively and Ryan Reynolds: James, Inez, Betty and Olin

“Parents are so different today. We’re so soft,” he continued. “I don’t shout. I grew up with that – it was crazy, it was a makeshift militia.”

Reynolds went on to explain how things have changed for the better.

“Now it’s like I can look at all my parenting resources and remind myself how to be perfectly compassionate,” he admitted.

Blake Lively and Ryan Reynolds in August 2024.

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Ryan Reynolds and Blake Lively Relationship Timeline

Reynolds and Lively – who married in September 2012 – are parents to daughters James, 9, Inez, 7, and Betty, 4, and son Olin, 1.

They’ve previously been candid about how they’re raising their children, as well as how raising children has changed them. Earlier this summer in an interview with PEOPLE, Reynolds revealed as much Deadpool & Wolverine director Shawn Levy gave him some of the most important parenting advice he’s ever received.

“Shawn Levy actually said something to me that stuck with me forever, that people only talk about their wins. But I think it’s especially important for your kids to know that you lose,” Reynolds told PEOPLE in June.

“You don’t get what you want all the time. Something you worked really hard for didn’t work out,” he continued. “You feel like you said something unpleasant today, you did something that didn’t sit well with you. It’s so important that [your kids] they see it and don’t just hear, ‘Oh, Dad made it.’ Because you lose much more than you gain.”

Reynolds added, “I’m really stuck.”

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Ryan Reynolds September 17, 2024

Andrew Schwartz/SIPA/Shutterstock

Elsewhere in Friday’s conversation with Collins, the actor talked about starting his production company Maximum Effort — and how Deadpool movies played a big role in his creation.

“I love wearing the Deadpool suit, and I refused to give it back. I worked for 10 years to make the movie, so I felt like if you want the suit back, come try it on and take it from me,” joked Reynolds.

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“I started promoting the film from home with a man in the digital marketing department at Fox, George Dewey, who would later become my general partner at Maximum Effort,” he said. “… Somehow I started falling in [marketing] accidentally. And then I really fell in love with it.”

Despite the great success in his business ventures and at the box office, Reynolds added that he still “doesn’t know exactly what I’m doing.”

“It’s so easy to look back and talk about things like you know what you’re doing. You have to be nimble,” he concluded. “Everybody’s kind of freaking him out.”

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Source: HIS Education